BARACK ROLL'D!!! loves it!

gotta love this!

For the Lover...

I've missed you since the last time we met
I'll never forget your moist and tender kisses,
your grace pressed gingerly against me in wonderment...

Your honesty piereced every nerve through my flesh
your hands embracing my body and approaching me with a careful angle,
not to provoke me, but to assure me that i can be free with you...

You're dangerous...

I've often wondered if you could ever hold someone eles the way you held me...

I've also fantasized of this moment in my thoughts of you and where you are...

I missed your kisses, those warm pellets of lingering silent halleluah's...

I still have the photo of us in our own world, lusting and luring each other whole, capturing us embraced in emotion...

...thank you

I'm Ready!!

I can't wait till i get to experience them LIVE! soon soon!

Lolapolooza '08 @ Grant Park August 1-3~

this eerie feeling krept up inside me when i watched this video. If you want to know how they did this, well, you'd have to google that, but trust me when i say, insanely effing dope, absolutely modern and poignant. this song is amazing in itself, but with the visual effects makes it even more interesting. Like Heath Ledgers character in the movie Candy, watching him in that role, is like what music does to my soul, but words can't describe the tingle that still resonates with me. And of course, Radiohead has been one of many to remain in rotation over a length of time....in the shower...hit repeat.

Daayum, that's cold!

this video is Method Man going diving off a stage (dummy) at a recent show, and as you will see, that crowd parts faster than you can say...TICAL!!

There just aren't enough words for the missed opportunity that should have been...
all i'm saying is that if i was in that crowd, i might have tried to catch him...naw, i would have been reaching for my camera too...Owwwch!

Watch This!!

In a series of films that my friends and I have been watching over the last couple of months, I recommended this one particularly for the incredible and amazing insight into one of the biggest questions (or should be) in my generations lifetime. Why big Corporations? I saw this movie about 3 years ago while i was involved with writing for a political magazine. Although my enthusiasm wasn't shared with my counterparts, I felt then and more strongly now that this is a particularly interesting piece, eloquently put. I asked my friend to up this one on her queue of movies to see because i felt that it has answers to some undying questions that need to be answered. I must admit, I felt like running off the grid after I saw this movie. It made me feel a little bit hopeless, with the myriad of issues that encompasses us all in working within this "machine". But, realizing that I can't run from these issues, the best that i could do is educate.

Enjoy~

In the shower...hit repeat.

Today is a day of somewhat importance. I'm getting to feel a little bit more grown up with the purchase of my new wheels. I had this song going in my mind when i was test driving and i realized that this song is maybe one of the greatest songs ever written. Thank you Stevie!



Stevie Wonder Lyrics
As Lyrics

Cooler than the coolest...

It's crazy to think that you went from here...













to here...


...then here



...here too

Sunsets...

While I have always had a fascination with Sunsets, I can remember back when i was younger that I had always loved going on my front porch and watching a slow moving sunset fade off into the distance. I knew then, sometimes i forget as i get older, that there is some sense of renewal. Every time i watched it go, I knew that i would never have today again, as long as that sun was going to set. I have a picture of one of the craziest, coolest sunsets that i was able to capture. I took this at my old apartment that i lived in maybe 4 years ago. It reminded me of some Spanish Villa that if you look long enough at the picture, you can start arranging the sea with the mountains and so on...
Would you believe that this was taken right off my balcony on the first floor? These were the roofs of the other buildings in my complex...Crazy!
However, there were no majestic mountains or valleys behind this view, only metaphorical ones, envolving the people that lived in that communtity. I still look at this in awe, i was practacing taking pictures of still life and i was able to catch this pic on a good day when the lighting was stellar and everything was just in its perfect place...

Happy 4th Of July!

Results...

Again, another solstice created an intoxicating pull of energy in this shift, tilting around another inevitable possiblity. Amazing! I love it when that happens. While still, we are in the throes of a cycle that needs to process throughly before a truth manifests, it will be an unpredented event...indeed. So, in other words, if you are feeling really good right now, then odds are your coming to complete the cycle and that energy is being restored. All sensiblity is heightend to its new form. I like this feeling. It's a crazy world that we live in, or maybe feeling the privilege of being a witness to the beauty that we don't see everyday or that most people never experience in thier lifetime. We have so much to digest that is raw, pure and organic about this impressive universe. I have to admit, that these last couple of weeks have proven to be of somewhat, importance. I've decided that I need to get those strings fixed on my guitar thats been sitting in my closet for over a year...i know, what a disgrace. totally unintentional, but no real good excuse. i got nothing. i miss it though, even being a beginner, but a fast learner, no doubt. My strings broke when i was moving the last time, which is why i hate moving, i don't think most people think that this is a great pastime to get together and do as often as possible, no! That's definately not my idea of quality socializing. But that's how your shit gets broken, is while moving...
So, none the less, i miss it and songwriting is much more fun with one, Besides, Liver gets her lyrics in from time to time that are true gems. Another thing of major importance, or maybe sheer materialism on my behalf, that i don't allow myself to indulge in, but i decided i want to drive this car...

Not bad.

It's a treat to myself for all the hard work that i do(patting my own back, thank you), and finally, i can afford it.

I'm thinking about breaking it in next month to take a road trip to my hometown in the Chi, just thinking about it makes me remember how cheap it is to fly there, and gas is way to gaad daamm high...ooops, snap back to reality! Ahh well, who knows, things could change...

Watch This!!

Another gem in the film fest that my friends and I have "unofficially" started a few weeks ago. There are a few more on the list, but for the start, this was amazing!
I saw a movie when i was younger called "Paris is Burning". Another amazing exploration into the world lesser known to those that are marginal thinkers. This goes without saying (i think) that music has always been a celebration of life, and these kids are at the epoch of the stages where your ideas of color and identity blur the lines of a lineage rooted in a subculture that goes somewhat unnoticed. These ideas aren't original, but are beautifully articulated in what had spawned from generations of folks that always challenge the status quo. I highly recomend this flick.

The Hurt...

Take me away like back in the day when they wrote love songs about you.
Those kinds of words meant something real, something that you can hold onto.
Nowadays, after those days, the message has changed and leaves me feeling strange.
The pureness feels more taught and less original, borderline criminal.
They used to say that you could cure it with a song, and somehow we got it all wrong.
I'm showing mixed emotions, because i dont' know how to feel anymore. Once it's gone, damn, it's gone and that's hard to get back.
I wanna hear that track from way back that i listend to when i was eight. no one could understand why i loved it so, but all i knew was that it was mine. They were songs about love, songs about life, songs about a world that i knew nothing about. My thoughts would play out like a romance novel, with the fiery fierce love being explored to endless depths. Dreams and illusions of what kind of love i would give to some unsuspecting thane. He, like me, would go wild at the lyrics before us and play them out with vivacious attitude and honest tread. We traverse the globe and find those muses that give us new hope in keeping the eternal flame of love glowing bright. But i'm a dreamer and my lyrics are only virginal at this stage. I have yet to give my song a name, so i'll keep on dreaming...

Crushed...

Hey y'all

for those that know...

hit repeat for '08

today, was pretty sucky

don't want to go into it

but it may be the thing that i need to get on to the real shit

they have been telling me for awhile that this shift was coming

it's HERE!

RADICAL CHANGES...

Saturday = Solstice, i.e, wear a helmet, so it doens't make a mess when your mind is blown...

i was having a jill scott moment...

Good music...good friends...good food...good wine... i dig for more meaning, like a dj digs in the crates, behind the smoke and mirrors...take me with you on a journey and you'll be glad i came, my eyes are so WIDE open, been that way since '78, lover of all peoples, traveling to places i've only seen in dreams, meeting those that leave a lasting impact on my soul, artist, dancers, singers, djs, writers, poets, workers, travelers, wonderers, seeking truth in a world of lies...secrets, soft whispers, bold thinkers, strong women, strong men, living simply so others may simply live, we all are revolutionary, how's yours coming?

Watch This!!

While fishing in this interstellar sea of love that is the internets, i stumbled upon this amazing film tralier that i am OBSESSED with fiding. I love it when that happens...keeps me thinking...

To my knowledge, this film isn't out yet or available on dvd. I will be checking this out once i can get my hands on a copy. If you know where i can find this, please forward me the info.

Peace.

~b.

My reflection....

You are the break of my brand new day/ I see your smile and it makes my heart love you/You are the bread I need for nourishment in my life/ You are my Oasis in a dry, lonely desert/ You are the light that I need to keep my soul warm on cold and trying days/ You and I were born to move mountains/ This is our calling/ We should heed it/ You are the fantasy in my mind that I have always known/ I am humble/ You are the promise that tomorrow will be filled with hope/ You are majestic/ You need no reassuring that I will go with you/ I am sincere/ When I hear your voice it soothes the wounds from an all to ignorant world/ I see us on top of clouds, watching and waiting for the miracles from below/ You have the heart of a lover/ Your words singe on the tip of my lips when I whisper your name/ You are the thoughts that keep me sane/ I am open to you love/ for it shows me how deep you can go/ You are my reflection/ the reminder that You are wind and I am earth/ We have a spirit that blends together to produce harmony for our seeds/ I am like no other/ I am the ground and the soil from my breath and flesh/ We are the stars that ignites the universe/ We are love/ I am the angel, dancing with the born and laughing with the gods/ You are my whale/ I ride your fin to see the globe until we find the voids last tale of nothingness/ We are the continents/ I can see into the future with you/ I am the rain/ You calm my woes with warmth and wisdom/ I am jazz/ You are blues/ We are rhythm/ You and I will bear the fruits to feed the lands/ You hold me in the highest light/ I keep you beside me for strength/ When I am weak/ I lean to you/ We are resolute/ My nights are laced with dreams of us on beaches with sand so white it kisses the moons reflection that dances off of it/ We are mavericks/ We supersede the wants that we can't have and build it up with taste of divine love/ You are my soul mate/ together we will walk the bridges to connect...

This Girl... a poem

I have been having a rough time these last few weeks with some writers block, so i decided today that i would stick with this and see what happens. Here is a style that i have been working on as i still try to find my "voice" in what it is that i want to say...so here it goes...



Why does she sit there so quiet?
I wonder what she's thinking about.
I see her with her hair nicely tied up in the back and away from her face.
She seems to like the color blue.
I only say this because her headband matches her shoes and her shirt.
She looks to be deep in a thought.
I still wonder what she's thinking about.
I wonder if her life is complicated,
or just as simple as a kiss on the cheek?
Maybe the men in her life loved her too much?

Or,


maybe,

her love has abandoned her for another.
Maybe her and her girlfriend just had a fight
and are thinking about leaving each other?
Or maybe they decided they are going to have children together.
Maybe, her mother is dying and she doesn't have anyone to talk with about it.
Maybe her little sister just gave birth to a baby she's not ready for?
Maybe she got a speeding ticket last night and doesn't have the money to pay for it.
Maybe her lover pushed her to do something that she is going to regret?
Maybe she's planning to leave the country?
Or, maybe, she just got back from a week in paradise.
Maybe she can't speak?
I envy her silence and wonder why she is so.
With all these things I've studied from her face since laying eyes on her,
i can't help but think,
what if she were doing the same thing
to me right now?

Could he get any doper?!?

I love Kanye!

...that is all.

oh, sometimes, i wish it was 1989 again...

I had this song stuck in my head all day. I was out last night for a minute, went to my spot, had one drink, and whoever was in charge of selecting the music, must have been feeling a slight emo vibe coming off of me...needless to say, a day later, i still have this song in my head. If they had let me, i could have stayed and sang all the songs off this album, which, in hindsight, might have freaked them out a bit, cause no black girl (gratian*) from the midwest should know this music...wrong*

*i am part greek & part haitian = gratian


Shoplifters Of The World Unite Lyrics

enjoy!

This day....

I have never been without something to say, for the most part. However, i'm struggling to find the words to fit what this feeling is. I saw this picture. This is a good start. I see myself, on a day like this, sitting on the other side of this player drinking a really great cup of coffee and listing to one of my favorite artist. I am not being asked what is not expected from me. I am in total bliss. I only have my headphones and maybe a good read to finish, but on this day, I am complete in my solitude. It's a very serene place to be on a day like this...

Saturn Returns....

I'm guilty. I have been obsessing over this phenomena that occurs to everyone at this point in our lives between 28-30, that, according to astrological charts and experts on the topic, it's when the planet Saturn has completely orbited around the sun (29.5 yrs) to the exact moment that you were born. In a brief explanation that i found out there on the "inter-web", you can draw your own conclusions about what it means and what it represents.

www.saturnreturn.net

Since I had heard of this event, right before I turned 28 last year, I was so scared of what the challenges hold ahead of me. But, I quickly became a believer in this strange and odd universal event. Right about the time of my birthday, my biological father had contacted me for the very first time in my entire life. That would set off a series of events for the remainder of the year that would forever change my relationship with the universe. My fiancee and I split right before our wedding was to take place and, untimely as the next event was, i was not prepared for the news that i received about his mother succumbing to terminal cancer. This was all in a matter of months that these events were happening. But during all this change, I had made up my mind that I was going to prevail.

This week, Heath Ledger, the actor, passed away in his home unexpectedly at the age of 28. He was a very gifted actor. I hate saying was because his work still lives on, so I'll say that he is an incredible actor and artist. But, of course, too young. He leaves behind a young daughter of 2, and his former partner, Michelle Williams, that I'm sure cared for him deeply. My condolences go out to their families at this time of hardship. It's crazy to say things about people in the public that you only knew through their work, but that feeling of loss is still relevant. It has weighed heavily on my mind this week, and I never even shared the same space physically with this person. But you know and feel the impact that they had on so many peoples lives.

Some say that during this transition time in our lives, we can/will experience tremendous challenges and obstacles that rarely ever result in death. As much speculation has been made about this persons' personal life, he is still someone's brother, son, father, and friend. No one of us is better than the other. Which has led me to posting these thoughts today. I have strong feelings about the changes that are going on all around us. In life and death.

Although, most hands that the universe deals us, happens for a reason, and I also think that there are great lessons to learn from loss, as painful as it can be, there is beauty waiting on the other side...

First comes love......

So,it's fucking friday, that means, tomorrow is Saturday!!!
I'm in love with my weekends. I am going to finish this book that i started last Sunday that's all about sex and debauchery, oh yeah, and of course ART!!! It's called Chinese Takeout and it's written by Arthur Neresian, he wrote "The Fuck-Up" which is hilarious, one of my favorites. I find myself sounding a lot like his characters that are made up of colorful folks that experience life at 80 mph. Really fast, and witty.

Sleep deprived...2 be cont'd....

I'm actually on about less than a hour of sleep right now, waiting for the day to let up so i can gleefully rest my locks on a pillow, with my name all over it! I had the worst case of insomnia that i have had in months. Ironically, Rudy called me last night and while it was still a decent hour...11pm...i told him i'm usually asleep by Midnight or 1 at the latest...well,i was up until 5am!!!! only to be up by 6:30am....yeah, thanks alot Rudy! you fucking jinx'd me! Wanker!

love,
b.

in the shower...hit repeat...

Keep Looking Lyrics


when my Ex and i broke up last year, these lyrics kept playing in my head, so much that it felt like she was prophetically telling me something that i needed to hear....hummm, interesting....

Traveling without moving....

This is one of the things i love best about having a place to call home, it's when visitors call me up and wanna come and spend the weekend/week with me and all my loveliness. Rudy is coming down from Michigan next month before heading off to Japan for a two year stint with his job. I'm excited to see him, it's been about 5 months since we kicked it like rock stars at my hangout, but we keep coming up with creative ways to figure out how to become real rock stars. He's into the same music as i and we call each other up late at night to brag to the other one what new music we heard...it's ridiculous really, but we are addicted to each other musically and i love it! I can't wait to visit Japan next year, it's going to be nuts! I already booked my trip and have about 40 places lined up that i have to see. I have a friend that lived there for 5 years and told me about these wicked little vending machines that are corner liquor stores...LOVE IT!!! You can have it your way in Japan. I wish i had more Japanese friends, but i'll leave that up to Rudy to do that over there for me!! Domo Eragato!!!

Hello you!

Hi!
I know i said this about a thousand times before, i will do a blog....so far, it's been about two years and Nil. So, as my resolution to myself and this upcoming year, i plan to devote sometime to keeping up with my own words. I have had a very interesting last 345 days. I was engaged for 3 years to who i thought was my soul mate, turned out he was just a playmate..hehe. But this last year brought about some changes that I needed. It was a rough start to a 2007, the rest of the year fared simply..ok, nothing to predict what this new year could quite possibly mean to this twenty something from the midwest, but suffice to say, it could be that this year will be more explosive as the one before. I could go on and on, and i will, but for now i will just pray the the literary gods are looking down on me and blessing me with the courage and strength to keep this up. *fingers crossed*. So, if you read this far, you must want a peek into this sometime ridiculous, yet amusing life, quilted with stories of life and friends,oh you know, the usual vague vestiges in the cycle of life. Oh, and let me not forget that i do have some major plans for this year of utter importance. YES!, i finally will be exiting my oh so treasured 20's, and trading it in (happily) for a more wiser and sophisticated looking 30! It's gonna be a scorcher!!